


Unrequited

by Finley_Fray



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Death, F/F, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Past Abuse, Sad, Sad Ending, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 03:55:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29182890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Finley_Fray/pseuds/Finley_Fray
Summary: <“Watch out!” Fin yells and drags Alex towards herself. The mission was a trap, and now they needed to get out immediately.“We need to retreat, you go first, go to the van. I’ll cover you.” Finley spoke fast, making a plan for them to get away. >Also on tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/finleyfray
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Alex Danvers/Original Female Character(s), Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Kudos: 6





	1. Unrequited

Finley ran though the DEO building to the debriefing room. She was late for her last mission this year. It was routine mission, just gathering intel.

But, Fin didn’t had the power today, she was exhausted from the lack of sleep because of her nightmares, anxiety and she had been feeling very depressed lately. Ever since her crush, Alex Danvers, decided to tell everyone that she’s dating Detective Maggie Sawyer. The same Alex that has rejected her 2 months ago when Fin asked her out, because, as Alex had said “Sorry, I’m not really into woman”.

She snuck into the common room hoping nobody will notice her. But it was foolish to think that, seeing as this mission was only for two people. Immediately Director J’onzz looked right at her.

“Good morning Agent Fray, care to explain why you are late?” His tone hard and authoritative.

Finley frowned ‘Shit.’

“Good morning Director, excuse me, the traffic was really bad this morning”

‘Well that was lame.’ Fin thought to herself. The reason she was late was that she really didn’t want to go on this mission with Alex. When she closed her eyes at night she hoped that she would actually die in her sleep. And when she woke up, she was so busy staring at the celling and contemplate if she should just shoot herself with her gun that she hides under her bed.

“Don’t make a habit out of it.” He said and went on with the debrief. “Alright, you’ll leave in 5.” He dismissed them, and Finley went to armoury.

“Hey, Finley.” Alex greeted her, picking up her gun and putting her Kevlar vest on.

“Agent Danvers.” Fin nods dismissively, not meeting Alex’s eyes. The older woman frowns.

“You know, I would feel better going on a mission with you if I didn’t get the feeling of hate from you.” Alex said annoyed. Fin took her time strapping a gun to her thigh, before answering. Trying to keep her emotions in check.

“Don’t worry Agent Danvers, we’re work partners, I can’t let anything happen to you, can I? I’m sure your girlfriend wouldn’t appreciate it.

“I…” The redhead didn’t know what to answer, so Fin took her chance and went to their van.

***

“Watch out!” Fin yells and drags Alex towards herself. The mission was a trap, and now they needed to get out immediately.

“We need to retreat, you go first, go to the van. I’ll cover you.” Finley spoke fast, making a plan for them to get away.

“You’re in no position to give orders!” The redhead snarls.

“Do you want to go home today or not!?” Finley yells “I don’t think you have a fucking choice, Danvers, just shut up and listen to me for fucks sake.”

Brown eyes look at her in disbelief, Fin was mostly a calm person, but right now anger was written all over her face.

“Look, it’s up to you, you need to go home to your girlfriend and your sister, not me. I couldn’t care less.”

“Alright!” Alex shouted “We’ll do what you say.”

The older woman went first and Fin covered for her, so Alex would make it to the door to their right. But there were too many assassins, shooting at them constantly. As Fin moved from her cover to follow Alex one of the bullets went right through Fin’s shoulder. She hisses in pain but doesn’t stop running.

“GO!” she screams as she jumps into the van and Alex slams her foot on the gas. “Ahh, shit.” Fin breathes out, and takes off her shirt to look at her wound and stem the bleeding.

“You’re hurt!” Alex yells glaring at Finley and the road repeatedly. “Why didn’t you put on a Kevlar!?”

“Yeah, no shit!” Finley snarls back. “It disrupts my movement. Just go to the DEO! I don’t need you stating the obvious now, I’m in pain!” The black-haired woman was bleeding badly and she didn’t need Alex to lecture her now. Just 5 minutes more on the road and she will be getting medical attention. But Finley’s eyes were growing heavier.

“Hey, don’t close your eyes! You can’t die now!” The redhead panics as she sees Finley’s eyes closing.

“Relax! I’m not dying yet, I’m just tired!” Fin opens her eyes, annoyed by the older woman. ‘Like she cares if I die’ She huffs.

When they arrive at the DEO, Finley goes to medic while Alex finds Director J’onzz to debrief.

***

Fin sits on the bed in DEO medical wing, all patched up and ready to go when Kara enters her room. While she was in a rough patch with the redhead, the blonde was her good friend.

“Hey, Fin, you alright?” Kara walks to her and gently touched her hand.

“Yeah, Kar, I’m good, ready to go home actually.” The black-haired woman gives the blonde a small smile.

“I’m happy you don’t have to stay here for Christmas. It would be really sad.” Kara smiles back. “What are you doing for Christmas? If you have nothing planned you really should join us! Our mother, Eliza, will come soon to National City, and she really bakes the best pie. There will be just 5 of us, Lena, me, Eliza, Maggie and Alex, it’s going to be fun!” Kara babbles on, and Fin does everything not to frown.

Kara doesn’t know about the situation with Alex and how awkward it would be for Finley to be around Maggie.

“Thanks for the invite Kara, but, I’m actually going to visit my family in Gotham” Finley tries to give the brightest smile she can.

“Oh, well, that’s fun! So I guess we’ll see you after Christmas, enjoy your free time!”

“I will, have fun!” Fin says cheerfully, but when Kara leaves the room Fin deflates. She sure wasn’t going to her family. The family that abused her for being gay, and threw her out at age 16. She had a hard time trying to survive on her own such a young age. She didn’t need to relive that. She’ll just have to spend Christmas alone.

Kara’s invitation sure was nice, but she didn’t want to spend time with Alex and Maggie, it was still painful to see her crush with someone else. Finley suppresses the urge to cry. The medical room isn’t the place for this. So she gathers her things and heads home.

***

It was 1 am the next morning and Fin couldn’t sleep. She had spent the whole of Christmas in bed. Feeling like someone had ripped her heart out.

‘Why am I even living at this point?’ She thinks. Her dark thoughts swirling around her head. ‘I’m basically a huge disappointment, my parents didn’t want me, they don’t think I’m worth anything. Alex had to lie about not being gay when I asked her out, to not make me feel bad, and now she’s with Maggie. I’m barely able to look at her without crying. How am I supposed to work with her?’ She sighs and looks around her room.

‘Everything would be so much better if I just disappear.’ Her mind is running fast of possibilities and suddenly she remembers. Her gun. She always hides her gun in her room. Under her bed. It was for safety reasons, if ever someone breaks into her apartment.

Fin reaches down and pulls the gun out of its hiding spot. It would be so easy, just load it and put it against her head.

‘It’s not like anybody would miss me.’ Finley thinks as she stares at the gun in her hands. It would be fast, bullet will pierce through her head. It would stop all her function right away. She wouldn’t really feel it. At least she hopes so.

“That’s it.” She inhales and slowly lets it out. Her hands shake as she loads her gun. Slowly Finley puts the pistol to her temple, takes a deep breath and pulls the trigger.

***

“Hey.” Kara greets Alex as Kara enters the training room. Alex stops punching the bag and looks at her sister. “J’onn wants to see us.”

The redhead nods and takes off the tape from her hands.

“Have you seen Finley today?” Kara asks, the crinkle appearing on her forehead.

“Hmm, no not really. It’s not like the first thing she does is come and see me anymore.” Alex frowns. Ever since she told the Superfriends that she was seeing Maggie, the black-haired woman avoided her at all cost. She can’t blame her, Alex remembers how a few weeks earlier Alex told Fin she wasn’t gay. Alex did like Finley, she just thought it was a friendly kind of like. And then she had met Maggie and everything she believed about being straight, turned out to be a lie.

But now she was stuck, cause she loved Maggie, but she also realised she liked… loved… Finley too. But it was too late now, Fin hated her.

“Maybe she’s not back from her parents yet.” Kara tried to think up different reasons why she hadn’t seen her friend. “She probably called J’onn for a day off or something.”

The sisters head to Director J’onzz office and Kara knocks before they entered.

“Alex, Kara, I’m happy to see you. I have a request, Finley didn’t come to work today. She also didn’t call me. I tried calling her, but she didn’t answer. This is unlike her, can you go to check on her?”

“She didn’t called? “ Kara frowns and looks at Alex “We thought she maybe wasn’t back from her parents yet.” J’onn looks at her surprised.

“Parents? Agent Fray doesn’t have a family.”

“B…but she said she was visiting her family for Christmas, when I asked her to come to spend it with us.” Kara looks at Alex, but she doesn’t said anything as Alex was thinking hard. ‘Why would she lie?’

“That can’t be right.” J’onn frowns. “When she left before Christmas I asked her what her plans were. She told me that you invited her, and she’s going to spend holiday with you.”

“Kara, we need to go! Now!” Alex panics and the sister’s race to Finely apartment.

***

“I smell blood” Kara said as they near Finley’s apartment, she superspeeds the rest of the way. Alex races after her. Kara opens Finley’s apartment door and she superspeeds through the home looking for her friend.

“FIN!” She yells as Alex runs into the apartment. But Alex was not prepared for what she saw. Her breath stops and she falls to her knees.

The black-haired woman lay there dead with a hole in her head. There was a lot of blood on her pillow, and a gun in her hand. Her blue eyes were closed, and there was a small smile on her blue lips. She looked relieved.

“No, no, no, wake up!” Her sister shakes Fin as if she was trying to bring her back to life, tears stream down her cheeks. “Alex!” The blonde looks at her sister, begging her to do something.

“F…Fin… She’s dead…” Alex chocks out.

***

“We have gathered here to say goodbye to our friend, Finley Fray…” J’onn begins his speech looking at the small group that came to Fin’s funeral. The Superfriend’s and a few DEO agents that were able to take the time off work.

Lena holds Kara close as she cries silently. Next to her was Eliza, and there was an empty place where Alex should sit, but she didn’t make it to the service. Next to the empty place sat Maggie and Winn. All of them listening to J’onn.

After the speech, the group gathered together.

“I can’t believe she’s dead…” Winn says sadly. “It just happened so sudden, it doesn’t make sense…”

“I wish I would see it sooner, I would help her…” Kara cries and Lena hugs her tighter. “I’m the worst friend.”

“It’s not your fault baby…” Lena says, trying to soothe her girlfriend. “We all failed to notice.”

J’onn looks down in shame. “I’m sorry… I knew she was struggling with a few things, I should’ve talk to her. I didn’t know it was that bad.” He sighs heavily. “Where’s Alex?” He looks at Maggie.

“Ehmm… she’s not really handling this well. She wouldn’t leave the apartment. I don’t think she is ready to say goodbye yet…”

***

Alex looks at the photo of her and Finley. It was taken 2 days before Fin asked the redhead on a date. Where the older woman panicked and said that she wasn’t gay. Everything was easier back than and Alex didn’t feel like her heart was ripped out of her body, thrown on the floor and stamped on.

She still couldn’t believe Fin killed herself.

Going to her funeral didn’t feel right, she should be alive.

The redhead took a sip from her glass of whiskey, suddenly feeling angry. She was angry at Fin for being so selfish, angry at herself for causing her pain and angry at the world that they took one of the woman she loved from her.

But it was too late now.


	2. Unrequited part 1

A loud knock sounds on Alex’s apartment door, that she chooses to ignore. Unfortunately for her the person doesn’t seem to give up.

“Alex, come on, open the door… Please?” Her girlfriend Maggie spoke, almost begging her to let her in “It’s been a week, you can’t go on like this. Let me in, I want to help you.”

Since Finley’s death, Alex wasn’t in a good place. She hasn’t left her bed, but she also couldn’t sleep. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Fin’s body, laying on the bed with a puddle of blood around her. Her short black hair covered in blood. Her face, pale, and her lips, blue.

The most disturbing thing was the smile she had. Indicating that her friend, the woman she loves… loved, was happy to die. And Alex wonders how much had she hurt the smaller girl so that she was so relieved to leave this world.

Alex knew this was her fault, she’s not going to deny it, she just wishes she could go back in time and fix everything. That she could tell the black-haired woman that she loved her before it was too late. Maybe Fin would be here now instead of lying in a coffin six feet under.

“Alex if you don’t open this door, I’m going to kick it down.” Maggie was getting desperate. She needed to make sure her girlfriend was okay, she needed to hold her and hear her breathing. Truth was, after Finley death, she became afraid. She didn’t know the woman that well, but she saw her, mostly before she and Alex begun dating. And what terrified her was that this black-haired woman didn’t look like she was about to kill herself.

Her smile was always so big and lit the room every time she came into it. She saw how the woman looked at Alex like she was her whole world. Until Maggie went on and took that world from her. And now, Maggie felt guilty.

“Alex baby please…” Maggie sighed, she could hear muffled footsteps and the door clicked open. Revealing the broken red haired woman. The detective immediately steps closer and envelops the Agent in a tight hug.

“Mags, please don’t leave me…” Alex sobs, hugging Maggie closer.

“Never…”

***

Alex was exhausted. She lay in bed holding Maggie as close as possible. She was afraid that if she ever lets go, the raven-haired woman would disappear.

“Sleep Al.” Maggie sleepily kisses her forehead.

“I can’t… Every time I close my eyes I see her dead body lying there.”

“Baby… I know Finley was your friend, and seeing a dead body can be traumatic…”

“No! You don’t understand, Maggie! I… I loved her…” Alex cried out.

“Uh… You… I didn’t know…” Maggie frowned “I don’t understand.”

“I love you Maggie, but I also loved Fin… I didn’t understand it before. How is that possible? I don’t know if I even understand it now.” Alex sighs heavily, rubbing her face. “But I loved her. And now it is too late, she’s dead and I can’t do anything about it. Maybe if I had figured this out sooner-”

“Babe, it’s not your fault-” Maggie interrupts only for Alex to interrupt her.

“But it is. It is my fault, I caused her so much pain that she shot herself, Maggie! She’d put a gun to her head and shot herself because of me. If it wasn’t because of me, she would’ve joined Kara for Christmas and she would still be alive!” Alex sits ups and punches the mattress. “She’d rather spend it alone than see me. She saved my life and three days later she killed herself! I failed to see her struggle, even if she was just my friend, I was the worst friend ever.” Alex roars. “How can I live with this, how can I live knowing a person killed them self because of me?! How can I look now into Kara’s eyes and tell her that her best friend is dead because of how I treated her?! Fin decided to not tell Kara about how I rejected her, cause she didn’t want to get her involved, and now I have to go to my baby sister and tell her that Fin is dead because I was too blind to notice that I loved her. I need her alive and breathing so I can hold her close and never let go-” Alex collapses into a sobbing mess, unable to talk anymore. Maggie reaches out and holds her girlfriend close. Rocking her gently and trying to soothe the broken woman.

Hours later Maggie looks at her resting girlfriend. Finally after hours of crying Alex fell asleep. Maggie wishes she could help her more, but the redhead was hurt too much. For now she has to just take care of her girlfriend the best she could.

***

Alex puts her Kevlar on and strapped a gun to her thigh. After a week of laying in bed she needed to go back to work. She needed to do something, otherwise she would go insane. She looked at her sister who sat on the bench next to her. Her sister who would normally smile and run around just being her happy self. Instead she just sat there and looked at an empty locker. The one that belonged to Finley.

“I miss her.” Kara whispers sadly blinking the tears away.

“Yeah-” Alex looks away. “After we’re back… Can we talk?” Alex feels her heart speeding. She needs to tell Kara, she can’t keep pretending and lying to her sister.

“Yes, of course” the blonde sends her a small smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. “We’ll talk later.”

***

But Cadmus was prepared for their arrival. They had 20 soldiers ready and waiting for them. The DEO together with NCPD begun shooting and fighting the ambush. Alex lost sight of Maggie in the chaos. “Alex?! Are you okay?” Kara calls to her through her comms.

“Yea, can you do anything?” Alex looks up as her sister nears her. Somehow the word goes into slow motion when Alex sees a green bullet fly towards Supergirl. Impaling her sister’s chest. Kara immediately falls 20 feet to the ground. Alex rushes to her sister and tries to apply pressure to the gushing wound.

“Come on Kara!” Alex sobs and moves to hold her sister. Knowing the bullet must have hit a major artery with how quick the blood is flowing from her sister. “You’ll be alright, just stay with me, okay? Don’t close your eyes, focus on me, focus on Lena! You need to stay awake.” Alex cries and looks at her sister. She sees Kara battling to stay awake.

“I’m sorry Alex… Tell Lena I love her…” The blonde puts her hand on her older sister cheek and her eyes close.

“No, no, no, you’ll tell her yourself, come on Kara!” Alex shakes her sister, Kara’s head lolls to the side and her chest stops moving. Her sister wasn’t breathing anymore. “Kara!”

***

“Where’s Maggie?!” The redhead ran through the DEO. She knew her girlfriend was badly hurt in the fight that took her sister and was rushed into surgery. “Where is she?!” She looks at the doctor standing in the hall.

“I’m sorry.” He looks at her apologetically “Detective Sawyer didn’t make it, she lost too much blood, we tried to bring her back, but it was too late.”

“No, no, this is a nightmare, this is not possible!” Alex yells and shoves him to the side “I need to see her, she can’t be dead!” The redhead opens the door and freezes.

Her girlfriend was dead. Her sister was dead. The woman she unknowingly loved was dead.

Alex has lost everything.


End file.
